“I guess I just need to go out with guys even if I don’t like them.”  Rachel sighed before taking another sip of coffee. I looked at her carefully. She was pretty. She was nice. She was smart. Then I realized that I had been staring at her for over a minute without saying anything. I laughed uncomfortably and muttered something about needing to mail a letter.

As I walked through downtown Boston, I thought about my conversation with Rachel. Like me, Rachel was single and new to Boston. 

I’m not saying there’s anything wrong with being single. I love being single. I really do. Sleeping alone is much better than sharing a bed, especially if your bedmate is a sleep kicker. Besides, I’m probably too busy to be in a relationship anyway. But let’s say that I wasn’t busy. Let’s say that my days were filled with free time, free time that I wanted to spend with a significant other. Who would I pass my afternoons with?

I sat on a bench in the Boston Common and observed the first guy that walked past. He wore a t-shirt that said, “Life is good.” I cringed. I really don’t like these sorts of t-shirts. My feeling is that if you need to tell the world how great your life is, on a t-shirt, your life probably isn’t that great after all. 

Was I being too judgmental? Maybe this guy’s life was actually really good. Maybe he traveled around the world on a private yacht and was only in Boston for the afternoon. Maybe he was a prince. Who was I to write him off as being lame just because he wanted to share his happiness, his good life, with the world? 

Maybe I am too picky. Maybe Rachel was right. Maybe I should go out with guys that I don’t like, because maybe, they could turn into guys that I do like.  

I thought about some of my own friends and their dating preferences. Maya refused to date any man shorter than 6 feet. Leah only dated dark-haired guys. Veronica just said no to mustaches.

“The problem with women is that they usually date a specific type of guy and refuse to consider dating anyone who doesn’t fit this mold,” My friend Jack once told me, “As a result, they miss out on meeting someone really great.”

I think Jack is right. I think men and women are both guilty of being too specific when it comes to dating. I am not suggesting that you settle for anything less than the best. What I am suggesting is that you try something new.

Imagine that you are at an ice cream shop, and you see your favorite flavor. Maybe it’s Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough, or maybe it’s Rocky Road. You tell the awkward teenage boy behind the counter that you’d like a scoop of the usual. It seems like the right decision, because it’s what you like. But is it? Maybe if you tried Pralines and Cream, you’d discover that you liked it even more than the usual. Of course, there’s always the chance that you could have an allergic reaction, but love is about taking risks, and I think we could all stand to be a little bit riskier.